Baby Wearing Part 2a: Healthy Baby Wearing

Before continuing on about my journey on baby wearing, and specifically with woven wraps, I thought I'd share what healthy baby wearing is.

There are many more carriers out there than even 5 years ago, or at least they are more widely known. The internet has definitely expanded the reach of markets across the globe, and fans of Tula, Beco, Ergo and Kinderpack have been posting pictures of themselves with their babes and the carrier with the print they oh-so-love.

But there are still some people who are risking their baby's health when carrying in certain ways. This is a touchy subject, as many informed parents wonder if they should ever approach another parent who may be wearing their child in a less-than-optimal position. On one hand, baby wearing is great so perhaps we should leave well enough alone. On the other hand, many of us say that if we were informed by another well-meaning parent, we would be grateful!

So, my passive-agressive way is to blog about it. =P Not like I know anyone who does so incorrectly anyway, but if you're baby wearing and unsure about the position, or looking to start and are learning the ropes, this post is for you.

WHY WEAR A BABY?

Firstly, why wear a baby? We can leave them in a stroller or put them in the crib or bouncer... but we all know there are many, many moments when babies just want to be held. And that's natural! They were in a small, cozy, dark space for so long and all of a sudden projected into a loud world with their limbs flailing. For at least the first 4 months, they will want to keep being in a place which simulates the environment they were in for 9 months. That's understandable, isn't it? Even after they get to know the world as we know it, there's a lot to take in and learn, and being near us, their parents, is a refuge.

Here is a post by Babywearing International which gives the benefits of baby wearing. Here are my bullet points of the page:

Happy Babies - they like being held! Great for colicky babies
Healthy Babies - being physically close helps baby regulate own physical responses, especially premies/special needs
Confident Parents - learning to read cues
Loving Caregivers - babies come to recognize their caregivers
Comfort and Convenience - can go about chores and tasks more easily

HOW TO WEAR A BABY?

You can refer to the poster above as provided by Health Canada, or you can learn to remember your TICKS!

Tight
In view at all times
Close enough to kiss
Keep chin off the chest
Supported back

Further explanations on the TICKS poster below. Click here for a link to the full version.

Note: "Supported back" used to say "Supported straight back" (emphasis mine) but for a baby, a curved back is more natural to their growth. Keep that baby's spine curved!

Kristen sleeping in the Moby while I eat... something. LOL.
But note the TICKS!

DANGERS TO BABY WEARING?

Here is what Health Canada has put up as warnings. My own thoughts in italics below each point taken from that page.

Serious injuries and deaths can occur when:

• the wearer trips and the baby falls out of the sling or carrier
• Falling out can also happen to babies in a stroller, and particularly to babies who are in infant seats precariously placed on top of grocery carts. I've seen so many babies balanced that way, and so many kids not strapped into their stroller and pretty much falling out! I don't see how a sling or carrier is more dangerous.
• the product malfunctions or its hardware breaks
• This can happen - and has happened - in strollers as well. This is, however, why it is SO important to get a high quality carrier. Woven wraps are not simply "another piece of fabric" or a table cloth or a bed sheet. I'll get into it in another post but there is much more care that goes into a woven wrap and soft structured carriers!
• the baby falls over the side of the sling or out through the leg openings
• Which is why learning how to use the carrier properly is necessary. As I mentioned before, I've seen babies and older children practically falling out of their stroller due to manufacturer's lack of foresight (Graco had a tray without a middle piece to meet the stroller so kids - unstrapped, mind you! - would slip right down and through) or simply due to parents not buckling their children in. No one has cried out "Danger!" on strollers.
• the baby is positioned incorrectly, causing suffocation against the product's fabric, the wearer's body, or their own chest
• I refer you back to the TICKS! Along with that is keeping the child's legs in the "M" or "frog-legged" position, which will be discussed below.

So what does unhealthy baby wearing look like? Tune in to my next post! And before you think I'm judging, I'll be posting up pictures of my unhealthy baby wearing. Most times it's just a matter of learning the correct way. Not all carrier manufacturers will tell you the right way to carry, just the right way to use their product. So let's all learn and promote healthy babies!

Baby Wearing Part 1: My Journey

Long time no post! Sorries and apologies... life happened and I fell off the blogging wagon. Again. Le sigh.

And life goes on. It's just blogging after all!

If we know each other on Facebook, you probably know that I've been swimming into the world of woven wraps. I've used baby carriers before and still have one, but after reading about and trying woven wraps, I really wish I had known about them 5 years ago!

I won't go terribly into depth here, but my baby wearing journey is as follows:

Moby wrap
Pouch sling
Britax carrier
Tula (standard)
Leo Storchenwiege (5/6)
Didymos Cotton Indio (6)
Didymos Hemp Indio (3)
Didymos Nino Rose (7 - was supposed to be a 5!)
Didymos Kurbis Wool (2)

 

L: Kristen kept nice and snuggly while I get to eat!
R: Kristen nursing while I spend time with Derek.

Why have I been switching over to wovens? Firstly, I love their versatility. I thought wraps were more like the Moby, which were hot to use even with my winter babies and so long - fabric was everywhere! That's why I went with the pouch sling, for quick ins and outs before my baby could walk, but I found it straining on the shoulder. I also couldn't use it after baby was a certain weight and size. Moby also has its limitations; even though it advertises use up to 35 lbs, many (including me) have found that it starts sagging after about 15 lbs of weight because of the stretch, requiring me to readjust and retie every 10-15 mins. Not a productive way to spend my time!

  

Derek at 8 months, about 18 lbs?

I then found out about the pouch sling, and I was really intrigued because it would allow me to  I could pop my baby in and out for quick trips to stores or when he was fussing and wanted out of the stroller. While it kept my hands free and was easy to put on, I found it strained my shoulder quite a bit and decided to stop using it.

Kristen snoozing from a walk, me imitating her.
I would NOT recommend outward-facing carrying.

When I found out I was expecting my second, The Britax carrier came out and I got really excited. I had heard that the Baby Bjorn was not the most comfortable due to insufficient lumbar support and spreading of the weight across larger portions of the wearer's body, like the shoulders and back. Britax addressed all of that and I was so excited to find a brand new one including the toddler insert for a fantastic price on Kijiji.

I used both the Moby and Britax with my second. Moby was during the infant months, Britax from about 4 months onward. It allowed me to breastfeed almost arms-free while I spent time with my toddler. We could read together, takes walks out, and I could do chores (hehe, if I wanted to!).

I learned about hip dysplasia not long after and decided I wasn't going to have my child outward-facing. I continued to use the Britax but would have Kristen facing inward, which she didn't appreciate as she wanted to look around. That was difficult to do with the padded structure of the Britax.

http://theportablebaby.com/carrierfeatures.html

Kristen in a standard-sized Tula.

I didn't start looking into other carrier options until my second child was about 18 months and thought about the possibility of walking with her to pick up my eldest from school. I knew I'd need something more comfortable and, even better, could do a back carry. I came across the Tula, along with the Beco and others, and decided on the Tula for the possibility of carrying my eldest in it as well, since it has a larger panel than most.

I got the Tula, I loved the Tula, still love the Tula, but once I found out I was pregnant with my third, realized that I may need to somehow juggle three - three!! - kids at the same time and it would be great if I could wear the younger two and hold the older one's hand. I could get another Tula but they aren't recommended until an infant is 8 lbs and may still require an insert because infants are tiny and, as mentioned, Tula panels are large. Ideally a child's position will have the knees higher than the bum, but with a large panel and small legs, the legs will just stick straight out.

Tula sleepy dust!
I put the hood up afterwards to hold her head.

I saw a picture of a friend on Facebook wearing both her kids with wraps, a newborn and her toddler. I was in awe and completely intrigued. They looked so comfortable and happy. And so snuggly! But I didn't really consider wraps until I heard more moms recommending them in Facebook parenting groups. I finally took the plunge and goodness, is there a LOT to learn!

It's not only about how to use them, but once you start, everyone has different preferences, and there are a plethora of wraps available to meet everyone's preferences, no matter how nuanced. From thickness/thinness, breathability in summers to warmth in winter, grip to slipperiness, bounce/stretch to very little give... and all of those are put in consideration with who is wearing AND who is being worn. I'll describe more in the the dedicated wraps post, but carrying a newborn is different from a 6-month-old, which is different from a 1-yr-old, which is different from a toddler/walker, which is different from a preschooler (yes, you can carry preschoolers!). More support is needed with more weight, but walking kids may end up being in and out of wraps requiring quick ups/downs and even better, pre-tying. All of these are affected by the different weaves and fabric blends available along with what size is used.

Carrying Derek in my first attempt at a ruck carry with a
size 3 Didymos ETHI (Emerald Turquoise Hemp Indio).
Note: The right shows how inexperienced I am as his "seat" is coming undone!

With all that consideration comes the many brands offered, just like baby food - or say, buying gardening tools, or power tools. Each brand has their reason for distinction, as well as varying price tags. I've chosen to stick with Didymos, mainly because I love their patterns and colours and they aren't as expensive as some other brands. I know if I start dipping into other brands I'll be racking up wraps like crazy!

So that's it for now. I'll try to put up a stash shot of my carriers* and wraps for reference. =) Stay tuned for my next post on healthy baby wearing!

*If they aren't sold first

Potty training update is coming!

Sorry for keeping you in suspense but as you can imagine, we've been doing a lot of running to the washroom and it's been tough getting anything significant done.  The kitchen was in the third ring of chaos until Derek was able to go to Grandma's for a couple nights.  We thought that would happen sooner but then realized that Grandma needed training in how to maintain the training, so we used her day off to come over to our place and observe how it works.  Consistency is important with training!

In the meantime, I thought I'd share some tips on how we're tackling baby stinky cloths and toilet-training toddler laundry.  Infant poop just ends up every where and stains almost anything it seems.  Kristen spit up a lot so I was cleaning milk vomit from her and my clothes.  Derek's recent learning is creating lots of stinky clothes but the reusable absorbency sheets we got shouldn't use fabric softener (which generally reduces absorbency of any material).  Aaaand he sometimes doesn't get the poopy in the potty, which makes me wish for Kristen's infant poops! =S Those are my issues; these are my solutions!

1. Buncha Farmer's stain remover.  After an initial rinse-off of the poop/milk, rub the stick over the affected area until foam builds up.  Rinse out the remover.  Repeat until the stain is not very noticeable (I usually only have to do this 2x in total).  Rub and foam one more time as a leave-in for the actual wash.

2. Baking Soda.  I soak smelly baby cloths in the sink with a liberal dusting of baking soda and enough cold water for me to swish the cloths around in.  I use baking soda in the "bleach" compartment of every wash cycle EXCEPT when I'm using vinegar for items that don't recommend fabric softener.  Let's not explode the budget-unfriendly washer!

3. Vinegar rinse* before washing for anything particularly smelly.

How about you? What tricks do you have for removing stains and smells?  What have you "lived with" because you couldn't find a workable solution?


*I've read recently that vinegar may harm the plastic tubing and such in a washer.  I don't have any definitive info, just someone posting on a forum thread what their service person told them. Vinegar compounds differ from bleach and it's that composition which is incompatible with the plastic.  Others, of course, have been using vinegar rinses in their washers for years and haven't noticed any issues.  Just thought I'd note this so you'd be aware of the health of your washer!

For seriously sleep-deprived parents...

... here is a great post by someone on FaceBook (Laura W.) with information on how to get assistance with your baby so you can get more sleep.

We need sleep to function and there's a lot depending on a new mother in the first few days, weeks and months postpartum.  Getting that sleep is always this issue, especially for those who do not have family nearby or friends able to help out.  Depression and anxiety is around the corner for the sleep-deprived but there are programs to help us get us (a bit more) on track.

I've simply cut and pasted this here rather than re-writing everything.  I wish this was more widely available so that I could make use of it myself but I know my situation isn't a bad one - if anything, it's pretty good, I just want more sleep in general!

Please forward this information to anyone you know, particularly those who are pregnant, especially with their first, or have given birth within the last 3 months.  They'll need this program the most!

I just wanted to post and let the ladies know about a program for those who may need it. In York Region, it's called 'Five Days, Five Nights'. I know that Toronto also offers this program as well. If you are suffering from anxiety, depression etc. or if you have previously experienced PPD/PPA/PPOCD, etc., speak to your Dr. or Midwife about this program.

You can stay in the hospital for five days and five nights to be monitored and to have some *sleep*. The studies show that if you are sleep deprived, isolated and without support, the postpartum time can be extremely difficult.  With sleep, going home doesn't seem as daunting and overwhelming - and in those first few days, it is so important for a new mother to be rested and know that she's alright.

Also, if you need it, a nurse with Public Health will follow you, come to your home to check up on you and baby and make sure you're doing ok. They can meet you outside the house and help you with 'getting out' if you need it.

There is also a program through Public Health that allows for a 'grandmother' type person to come and hold the baby and entertain an older sibling if needed so that you can rest, clean, cook etc once a week for up to two hours.

Please, speak to your health care provider if you are feeling anxious, angry, sad, sleepless for 'no apparent reason' etc. A healthy, happy mom makes great mom. It's a hard time and you don't have to be alone. 

In York Region there is a programme called 'Life With a Baby' that organizes get togethers *daily* if you need to get out and see real life people.

Remember, your baby will sleep again... even though you feel like they will never sleep - especially when you need them to. They will stop crying. They will eat. Just think - they won't be this little forever... and the next stage may not be better - just different. You are doing a great job. And if you need any help... please don't be fearful to let someone - anyone - know.

Big hugs to all the Mammas that need it.

TIme flies, a long weekend goes by...

.... and then I get mastitis, in all its chills, sweats, and tender-areas glory.

And so it's been three weeks since I've posted.  I think that's a record!  Not one that I'm looking to beat, by any means.  In honour of breaking it, here is a post about - what else? - mastitis!

What is is? It is an inflammation of the breast tissue.  It can be bacterial OR non-bacterial.

How does it happen? Most typically it happens amongst breast-feeding moms, or more generally, lactating moms.  I came across a forum where one pregnant lady had it due to her colostrum*!  The milk ducts aren't cleared, the milk (or colostrum) sits there and irritates the breast tissue.

When does it happen? Usually in the first several weeks postpartum when the body is finding its rhythm for supplying milk to the newborn, especially in the first two week after the milk comes in due to engorgement.  It can happen at any time though; my personal experience is when my daughter began nursing less but my breasts were still producing the same volume of milk, so milk sat around and eventually led to irritation and (more!).

How is it prevented? By draining or nearly the breast of milk either with every feed or, if baby is drinking less, by pumping right after a feed.  This is also important to reduce the chances of engorgement.

What are the symptoms? Not all symptoms will appear, nor will they appear at the same time but I'd (unprofessionally) say if you have at least 3 of these, have your breasts checked out.  Those with **'s are ones I experienced.
- Itchy area(s) of the breast**
- Tender area(s) of the breast, likely corresponding with the itchy areas**
-  Redness or red streaks, likely corresponding with itchy/tender area**
- Swelling of the breast(s)
- Foul-smelling milk/change in milk odour
- Thicker texture of milk
- Pus or blood with milk
- Chills and/or sweat**
- Fever**
- Nausea**

How is it treated? Here are some short answers to this:
- REST! Straight to bed, nurse the baby in bed, only get up to clean up yourself, answer nature's call or eat.
- Massage affected area of breasts to encourage milk flow and unplug the milk ducts
- Massages best done in a hot bath or shower, or after/with a warm compress to the breast
- Take Advil to help with the pain and fever
- Use a cold compress after feeding to relieve pain/swelling
- Dress warmly
- If you're experiencing chills, SEE THE DOCTOR A.S.A.P.  This most likely signals a bacterial infection for which you will need antibiotics (that are safe for the baby).  The sooner this is treated, the better, otherwise you may experience an relapse (which I did!).

Now it's getting late and I'm not sure what else to post but I hope that's enough for readers to go on.  For more - and more in-depth - information on mastitis and plugged ducts, please check out this link at KellyMom.  Very useful site on all things breastfeeding!

I will post my experience on mastitis soon.  Stay well mommies!


* Liquid produced by mothers in the first week or so postpartum that is not yet milk but just what the newborn needs.  Don't let older folks tell you it's "water" and not to feed it to the baby!

Teething, our next chapter

Never mind the solid food bit, I know teething is coming down the timeline for our little Kristen as well.  As a result from a net surfing something else altogether, I came across this mom's post for a natural teething remedy.  I'm looking forward to trying this out!

All you'll need are the following (taken directly from mommypotamus):

Ingredients

• 2 tablespoons olive oil, or for a milder flavor 1 tablespoon olive and 1 tablespoon coconut oil
• 2 drops clove bud* essential oil

For the full post, please click here.


*I was actually researching cloves stemming from someone's FaceBook post about a natural mosquito repellant.  I didn't know what cloves were and had only heard about garlic cloves.  Cloves are really neat and useful!  For the mosquito repellant, please click here.  It's not the same post but it's along the same lines and actually has 3 versions for different uses.

Foody Thingies: Nuby infant spoons

Kristen will be starting solids soon (although I think she can start now and I'm delaying because nursing is so much simpler than solids!) so I've started gathering supplies.  The spoons we used for Derek are worn and a tad smelly as the soft plastic has retained some food odours.  I loved them, the Tommee Tippee explora heat sensing spoons, but thought I'd give the Nuby ones I try because they have a smaller tip.

I broke them out of the package to wash them and waited to see how the tips would change colour.  I'm a nerd for science-y things. =P  I waited... waited... turned the water higher... higher... then the highest heat setting we had and still, no change!  Finally the coloured area started changing to white, but not after I'd been running the hottest tap water setting for 5 seconds over the spoons!  Below is a picture of the spoons after they've changed colour.

Here is the package they come in, advertising the change in tip colour if the food is too hot.

And finally, the back with instructions.  It notes that to detect if the food is too hot, stir the spoon around in the food then check to see if the tip has changed.

Maybe I'm spoiled by Tommee Tippee but I expected it to change not long after it makes contact with the food, not after I've been stirring for 15 seconds.  Regardless, it took a much higher temperature than I would allow for even my food to change, let alone for a baby!

Thankfully they weren't that much and I do prefer the longer handle... which leads me to remember that one of the great features of the Tommee spoons is that they are designed such that the bowl of the spoon doesn't touch the table when it's laid down.  Le sigh... I'll use these in the beginning and have them around but it seems we'll be going back to Tommee again!  I'll spew my love for this brand at another date.  =)

Singing the Future

Sorry this one's so late!  Got caught up with other things last night.

One suggestion almost everyone makes to help soothe babies is singing but what I realized when I first started singing to Derek, I was singing more to myself than to him.  Not in a selfish way, more like a I-need-to-be-reminded-to-keep-my-sanity way, especially at 3 am!  So I chose songs that had messages I wanted to impart to him and would remind me as to why I'm committing myself to less sleep and playing a continuous game of Guess the Wail (or Guess the Babble during happier times!).  They would keep me focused as to how I'm parenting, who I'm parenting and remind me to make wise decisions during tough times that will lay down a solid parenting foundation for future days that will hold other joys and struggles.

The songs I chose are Christian-based but you can use any song that will help soothe you as you soothe your baby.  Mine are the following:

This Little Light Of Mine (learn the song and lyrics here; fun gospel version here)
I chose this song because I wanted to remind myself to raise up a child who would be a light wherever he goes, prayerfully a light within God's church as he grows, and that he is my little light, reminding me of the blessing and opportunity God have given me to partake in creation by giving birth to life.  It also has 2 other verses to make it fun during more active times ("Hide it under a bush - oh no!" "Won't let Satan blow it out" with the option of a light blowing* into the face instead of saying "blow").

Beautiful (learn the song and lyrics here; my awesomely talented brother plays an acoustic medley with other songs here)
This song was chosen mainly for the line, "Jesus makes beautiful things of my life", which He has in the little lives he has blessed me with.  It reminds me in those wee dark hours that I have been charged to take care of this beautiful creation and not to harm it, as a fatigued and frustrated may stray to do.

I Cast All My Cares Upon You (learn the song and lyrics here - this is the series I sang with decades ago!)
I blend this song with "Beautiful" as they're both in 6/8 time.  It also keeps me from getting to bored and falling asleep!  This was especially helpful when Derek was crying and not falling asleep for who knows what reason - he's changed, fed and burped, so why won't he just sleep?  I'm comforted to know that God is watching over me and watching over Derek, and that I can lean on Him when I'm feeling so tired.  I can cast my worries about this crying child into His hands and know He'll be working with me to figure things out!

So if you're feeling at the end of your rope sometimes while caring for your little one, try picking up one of these songs, singing as you change a diaper or bathe a wriggling body or wait for a tantrum to let up, not necessarily to calm them down, although we hope it will, but to help calm you down and re-focus your purpose in parenting. Of course, no need to finish the song at their expense (I used to feel obligated to finish the song before I moved on to my next action, lol) but if you're feeling frayed, keep singing till you feel a bit calmer and more ready to handle the situation.  We'll never have it all together but anything that helps us be a bit better helps, right?  And the more you sing your repertoire, the more your child will become familiar with it which can help with bonding, his/her speech building, musicality, etc.  It's tons of fun especially when toddler months hit and sing-alongs begin!

How about you? What tricks or methods do you employ to keep yourself sane?  If you were to choose a song, which would it be and why?